Have a nice day

I always hearken back to "Things not to say to the parent of a type 1 diabetic", but am still astonished at what people will say to me and M when we are out in public.

I suppose that some of it is my fault. After all, I am not a big privacy person. When people ask questions, I give them answers. Then they feel free to tell me things I don't want to hear.

Case in point: we are in the Payless, a shoe store, for those of you who do not know. We are seeking somewhat fancy shoes for the somewhat fancy occasions of M's 8th grade graduation and her cousin's christening.

Nearly all of the shoes are thongs. In other words, they have a strap or something that is designed to station itself between the big toe and the second toe. All diabetic literature forbids this style of shoe. Diabetic feet are very sensitive and prone to infection. Putting something between your diabetic toes that will rub, get moist, or possibly break the skin is super bad news.

I can't tell you how many times I have heard about diabetic feet getting amputated.

Fortunately, M seems to find potential amputation to be motivation enough to stay away from some pretty cute shoes.

At this particular Payless, there is an extremely helpful sales clerk, who is always there to help us find things. She has a lovely accent that I cannot quite identify, but I suspect she is a native speaker of Portuguese or Latin American Spanish.

As usual, she was eager to help M find the perfect pair of shoes. She pulled out pair after pair of thonged sandals. M politely declined each pair in turn while seeking sandals without the forbidden thong. The sales clerk was persistent, which is typical of her, pointing out "how cute" each one was.

M said, "They are cute, but I can't buy that kind of shoe."

The clerk looked confused, "Can't....?"

I chimed in, "She has diabetes. Her doctor doesn't like her to wear that kind of shoe."

She nodded curtly and searched diligently for appropriate shoes. We found a pair that worked, and brought it up to the register.

This is when the fun happened.

"You have diabetes? You are so young to have diabetes. So you can't have candy, right?"

M replied, "I do watch what I eat, but I can have candy once in a while."

"Oh no, you can't. My dear cousin, Esmerelda had diabetes. She was such a sweet girl. She ate candy. And do you know what?" she asked in a hushed voice, "She went blind."

Ah, the old "she went blind" story. Always a favorite for me. There are enough youtube videos about this to fill a 10 disk DVD set.

Awkward, but not finished. Apparently reminding me that my daughter might go blind in her lifetime wasn't quite enough. She was going to have to scare M as well.

Our sales clerk continued, "She is no longer with us. She was a sweet girl, but she didn't take care of herself. She left behind a young daughter, too. It was such a shame."

I thought the clerk was going to tear up, a prospect for which I was unprepared. M and I had settled into a patient silence while we waited for her to wind herself back down.

She smiled sadly at us, but finally rang up the shoes with this final missive: "Watch that candy!"

Ummmm. Thanks? Have a nice day!

Ooof! I wasn't expecting that!